How does a boy pee?

It’s the most darling thing possible. On checking my blog’s stats today, they reported to me that someone had stumbled onto my site while searching in Google for “how does a boy pee”. Oh, my, the little darling!

What innocence! What bright-eyed wonder! That little girl is a treasure! Playing marbles in the early springtime sun, when she overhears: “Boys don’t pee sitting down, stupid!” This sends her little mind reeling. At home that night, her parents give her a half-hour of supervised “inty-net” time to look at pictures of penny-whistles and moonpies. When mommy goes to change her tampon or something, she secretly sneaks a peek at google, “the grownup page”. She only has time for one question: “how does a boy pee?”

A Darling Girl Questions the Activity of the Male UrethraAnd, unfortunately, for her, she only has time to click on my link, when there were so many more authorities on the manner in which pee comes out a boy’s urethra. Instead, she’s brought into a world where vaginas speak freely, monkeys play pro sports, and mysteries take place in five seconds or less.

Oh, little girl! I never wanted for it to be this way! You should be finding out about the world through My Little Pony, The Popples, and watching a boy’s pee-stream behind the porta-pack.

Oh, sweety! Let’s forget you ever found this vortex of depravity and cynicism. Let your wonder of the phallus blossom and grow until such a time where you are either sick of seeing them or physically unable to accommodate one. Until then, may you continue to ask of the world the dearest questions. And may the answer to those questions be only ones that you can mispronouce in a cute way.
Muse on, my dear! Muse on!


6 Responses to “How does a boy pee?”

  1. March 18, 2006 at 10:41 am

    I have four daughters and a son. My third daughter was born after my son. It tooks me weeks to convince her that she couldn’t stand in front of the toilet and pee like her brother did.

  2. March 20, 2006 at 1:51 pm

    I have an ex-boyfriend who pees sitting down, and I liked it.

  3. 3 Paslibe
    March 21, 2006 at 7:20 am

    As kids we used to have pee races over bridges and as adults as well.

  4. March 21, 2006 at 1:09 pm

    Wow, kudos to those adults for lying still as you urinated over them…

  5. 5 Wee Willie
    July 17, 2010 at 5:31 am

    I always sit on the john to pee at home; I hate guys that pee on floor.
    I love peeing outside: I’m a nudist so it’s easy.

  6. October 31, 2016 at 1:06 am

    Genuinely when someone doesn’t know then its up to other visitors that they will
    assist, so here it occurs.

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